Here at TheBenchWarmer, the only thing I like almost as much as watching sports is reading sports blogs.  Now I have my favorites, and they are over on my blogroll.  But my favorite thing to do in this blog-o-sphere is watching The Blog Show, its sad I know, but I just sit there every Friday waiting for it to come on.  I know I am not in it…yet…but you should probably check it out, over here:

Blog Show 16

I didn’t want to resort to link dumping so early, but its Friday night, and I am already not sober for the most part, so here are the best links of the week(I will have something about the whole Mike Vick and the crooked ref tomorrow):

• The guys over at Jack Tripper look at the history of Starter Jackets.
• Bill Simmons gets pwned.
• Im voting for Gammons, are you?
• Tim Duncan stinging.

Thats all I got for now, like I said, im not 100% mentally so sorry for the small amount of links. The final two links are just for me to show off. I was featured in Deadspin and The Big Lead helping my post become the #2 post on WordPress. Big ups to both of those sites, for helping lil’ ol BenchWarmer out. Again, stay tuned tomorrow for a real post.

Ok, this is a video that a few of my friends and I found a while back of Bas Rutten teaching everyone the nuances of self-defense. I forgot about this video for a while until watching reruns of IFL Battlegrounds, and looky looky who was the announcer. Bas.

Welcome everyone to the Bench Warmer’s Super Duper Six. A new little thing that I will be doing. Every Thursday, we are going to look at a big trend in the sports world, do some research, and then come up with our top 6 in that category. Why 6? Well, this is an attempt to be original, you got the T-mobile Fave Five, the Fantastic Four, and the Dynamic Duo. I am just showing 6 some love. Confused? Don’t worry after a little while you will get the hang of it:

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Dimitri Young has been playing out of his mind as of late, so well that he started a fashion statement. The Meathook, as he is so affectionately called by his fans, got me thinking. Who are the best fat athletes of all time? After a ton of research. Get it, its a pun, a ton…I came up a list of the best fat athletes of all time, well at least of my time. And don’t go looking for linemen or sumo wrestlers here:

6. Phil Mickelson

The sleeper of this list. Why is the three time major-champion on this list you ask? Two words. Man boobies. I mean, just look at the picture up above. You can see his breasts through his shirt. Believe me, I know from experience, that should not happen.

5. Robert Traylor

Here is a guy who’s nickname catapulted him into this list. Robert “Tractor” Traylor didn’t really do much in the pros, with a career average of 4.8 PPG and rumor has it he is playing for some random team in Puerto Rico. But his nickname and the fact that he did break a backboard, gets him in the Super Duper Six.

4. Tony Gwynn

No Tony Gwynn did not have a catchy nickname, playing on his weight. He is on this list because he could flat out hit. He is an eight-time batting champion with over 3,000 hits and a career batting average of .338. I guess that’s good enough to get on this list.

3. Cecil Fielder/Prince Fielder

This father and son combo probably can’t ride in the same car or walk over a bridge together for fear of their own lives and the lives of others. There is a legitimate chance that these two weigh over 600 pounds. If we were to weigh them, we would have to use one of those scales that trucks get weighed on. OK, enough of the fat jokes, these two can pound home runs out of the park. There is a rumor that at 15 little(used loosely here) Price hit a home run out of a major league park.

2. John Daly

That picture almost made me put him at the #1 spot. Almost. Jon Daly is one of the most loved pro golfers despite his size, drinking problems, gambling, domestic abuse, and his lack of winning. Despite all the problems, he is a major champion and normally chats it up with the crowd when he plays. Who would of thought that there would be two golfers in this list? With all that swinging and stuff, you would think they were all lean and mean.

1. Charles Barkley

How can a list of the best fat athletes not include the “Round Mound of Rebound.” Not only is he one of the NBA’s top 50 players, ever, but he is on the best NBA post-game show, and he got a mug shot.

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There you have it, the first ever Super Duper Six. If you have any suggestions, or think I made mistakes with this list, leave a comment with your suggestions.

 

Whats up everyone, I know what you are asking…”The Bench Warmer, where the hell were you?!?” Well, I was on a self imposed internet break due to work. I am back now, so none of you have to worry, well nobody should worry except myself. I have to live up to my hits after my last post. Since the day of my last post, my hits have only gone up. I am sort of the sports blog version of Tupac if you will. Don’t believe me? Well, I got proof. Just take a look at my mad photoshop skillz.

See, mad skillz. Well anyway, expect to see some more updates later tonight, plus a sports-related post at some point.

You want an unusual sports injury? How about being speared in the buttocks. Yup, you guessed it, yesterday marked the start of the Running Of The Bulls in Pamplona, Spain. Around 100 people were injured but the person who got it the worst was an Australian man who I quote:

The 36-year-old was speared in the buttocks and had to undergo emergency surgery, rescue services said.

I don’t know about anyone else, but I am not getting myself involved in any activity that can get me speared in the ass. I know there is no score kept of this event, but if there was, Australia would be dominating. Even though they would probably lose points from the man who got bull-horns in his ass, there two bull-runner chicks that would catapult the kangaroo country back into first place.

Australians among the revellers included Sara Newey, 23, and Rene Armstrong, 25, from Perth, who said that in the preceding 12 hours they had drunk a bottle of Jack Daniel’s bourbon, several bottles of sangria (a blend of wine and fruit) and six beers each.

“You just have to keep going,” Ms Newey said with a carton of sangria in one hand and a bottle of sparkling wine in the other.

Here is hoping that they do not get gored in the ass. At least not by a bull…

Welcome all to a new feature of The Bench Warmer, called the Sportsman of the Week. Every Saturday I, The Bench Warmer, will choose an athlete, sportscaster, coach, or anyone who has anything to do with sports, who made the greatest impact during the week. And I am proud to announce that the first ever Sportsman of the week is….

Joey Chestnut! Look at that face. That is the face of a champion! Was there any doubt really? First of all, he makes eating a whole bunch of hot dogs in a short amount of time cool. In high school, if anyone ate even 3 hotdogs, we would point and laugh and call that guy a fatass. When Joey does it however, he is an American Hero. Second, he set a new world record with 66 dogs including the bun. Third, and most importantly, he ended a dynasty. He took out Kobayashi, who was the 6-time Hot Dog Champ. Joey’s win is comparable to some French dude beating Lance Armstrong. All you Kobayashi supporters who say he had jaw arthritis, you are full of it! I didn’t know that jaw arthritis caused reversals.

Joey in action:

So congratulations to you Joey Chestnut, for being the week’s sportsman. Enjoy the win, and I am going to eat this hot dog for you, as fast as I can!

 

In other news, blogshow is back! Check it out over here!

Kobe may ACT tough, but apologizing? Soft as hell!

 

SI.com is reporting that Kobe Bryant has met with Lakers’ GM Mitch Kupchak to apologize to him in person. Here is Kobe’s take on the meet:

“I just felt like as a man, it was important for me to tell him, ‘I’m sorry it came out that way,”‘

“I was frustrated, I was venting,”

Kobe said these things at a small press conference that he held during his basketball camp. After the press conference Kobe then taught the youngsters key basketball techniques not limited to, but including: How to convince your teammates to pass you the ball, how to ridicule said teammates if they do not pass, making demands through the media, and most importantly, ALWAYS get the chick to sign a waiver (What? It had to be said). Now we heard what Kobe said went down at the meeting, but here is what “The Bench Warmer” thinks could have been said.

• I didn’t know we were on air. My bad.
• THAT many people listen to ESPN Radio and watch SportsCenter? I had no idea.
• I was blacked-out…what happened?

Now it must be know that I really dislike Kobe, and that may be the reason I think he has other motives in apologizing, the main one being, he now knows the Lakers called his bluff and he needs to make nice with Kupchak so that he can get his boy KG in a trade.

Finally some content to hold you guys over…a nice video investigating the biggest thing to hit the NFL last year.  The King.

I know I know…I haven’t posted anything about sports…yet.  If you are part of the many readers already following me, you must notice the changes.  Well, they will keep coming and I promise, a post about sports will come soon.